This guide was made possible by a grant from the Unitarian
Universalist Veatch Program at Shelter Rock.
Guide written by Sofía Betancourt & Julia Watts Belser.
Contents
Introduction
Proverbs of Ashes: Violence,Redemptive Suffering
and the Search for What Saves Us provides
us with a testament to the power of oft-silenced voices and illuminates
the way our personal stories can become calls for liberation. With
gripping honesty and unapologetic truth-telling, Rita Nakashima
Brock and Rebecca Ann Parker model a process by which individuals
and religious communities can reflect on their personal and shared
histories in order to challenge limiting theologies and reshape
our common truths.
The authors call us to engage with the narratives
of Jesus’ death and the meanings that our cultures and religious
communities attribute to it. Parker writes, “When theology presents
Jesus’ death as God’s sacrifice of his beloved child for the sake
of the world, it teaches that the highest love is sacrifice.” (Proverbs
of Ashes, p. 25) Regardless of our personal beliefs about sin,
suffering, and salvation, we are still affected by cultural perceptions
that good comes to us because we have suffered. Instead of sacrifice,
Proverbs of Ashes calls us to reimagine what it means to
realize our full spiritual potential.
Throughout the book the authors wrestle
candidly with weighty issues, including suicide, sexual abuse, domestic
violence, racism, homophobia, the struggle for transgender rights,
and the challenges of bridging multiple cultural identities. Instead
of focusing explicitly on the particular social justice issues raised
by the book, we have chosen to engage with the larger project that
the authors describe – acknowledging violent theologies and seeking
to transform them in our own lives and in the lives of our religious
communities.
This is difficult emotional work. As
a leader, you may find yourself facilitating some very challenging
discussions. We encourage you to work with your minister or another
person whose spiritual counsel you trust. It is important that you
be supported as you support others in this work and that you remain
clear in your own mind about the nature of such a study group as
thoughtful reflection upon experience, rather than as therapeutic
processing of raw experience. Some participants may find themselves
grappling with issues that are beyond your expertise. We encourage
you to refer them privately to your minister or to other professionals
in the community.
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Getting Started
Promote the Program
Many congregations have a number of
resources for publicizing new programs in the community. It is always
a good idea to create flyers and post notices on bulletin boards
and in newsletters. Announcements during meetings and services help
spread the word. Some congregations promote new programs by organizing “Kick-off Sundays,” which include a sermon by a minister or lay
leader about a related topic.
You might consider targeting specific
groups to embark on this journey. This series is ideally suited
for use in covenant groups (small group ministry), women’s groups,adult
religious education classes, and book clubs.
Adjust the Format as Needed
This program includes reading, reflection,
and participation in three two-hour discussion sessions. We recommend
a group size of no more than ten people. While the discussion guide
offers specific questions, readings and activities, feel free to
adapt the program to your own needs. You can substitute your own
questions, include your own readings and prayers, adapt those that
are provided here, and add thoughts of your own.
Provide a Comfortable Setting
Hold the session in a comfortable, well-lit,
accessiblesetting, with chairs arranged in a circle. Some discussions
will be carried out in small groups of two to four people, so it
is important to find a space that will enable uninterrupted discussion
for small groups as well as for the larger group. Several discussion
sessions call for information to be recorded on newsprint. Bring
nametags for participants to use. You might ask volunteers to provide
refreshments and perhaps a light snack.
Do your best to hold the sessions in
a room that is wheelchair accessible and make sure accessibility
needs of the participants have been planned for in advance.
Involve the Group in Setting the Tone
The group should take responsibility
for creating an environment that is welcoming and conducive to open
dialogue. Bring to the group’s attention the importance of active
listening, thoughtful responses, and mutual respect. Also, note
that occasional silences are acceptable. Use people’s own experiences
as a way to ground the discussion when it threatens to become too
abstract and use theological questions to invite reflection when
discussion turns to therapy.
Some people have a tendency to be more
vocal than others. If a few people clearly dominate the conversation,
you might need to open a space for those who have not had a chance
to speak to do so if they wish.
As a discussion leader, it is important
to establish a balance between too much control and too little direction.
It will be important to be responsive in your leadership and draw
people out, as well as keep the discussion on track.
We suggest that the group draft a set
of ground rules at the beginning of the first session, post them
on newsprint, and review them at the beginning of the second and
third sessions. If all participants give input, everyone will be
accountable to the group’s needs. Common ground rules include:
- arrive on time and agree to attend
all three sessions.
- turn off pagers and cell phones
during the program
- make personal (“I”) statements—don’t
speak for others
- give full attention to the person
who is speaking
- use inclusive language
Prepare for the First Session
Ask participants to read Proverbs
of Ashes in its entirety before the first session. Encourage
them to keep a journal of their thoughts and reactions while reading
the book, and throughout the course of the program. Let them know
that they will be encouraged to bring in their own life experiences
and spiritual beliefs to share with the group—as well as to reflect
on the feelings catalyzed by the stories shared in Proverbs of
Ashes. Remind participants to bring Proverbs of Ashes
and their journals with them to the meetings.
Evaluate the Program
Two evaluation forms are provided in
the last pages of this guide. Participant Evaluation Forms should
be distributed at the end of the final session so participants can
give feedback to group leaders. (Note that questions 7 and 8 on
the form give leaders a chance to pose their own questions to participants.)
Also, be sure to send Beacon Press your completed Leader Evaluation
Form. We are striving to meet the program needs of UU congregations,
and your continued feedback and suggestions will bring us a long
way toward reaching our goal. We really want to hear from you!
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Session One: Sharing Our Religious Histories
Materials: Newsprint,
markers, masking tape, chalice, candle, matches, nametags, UUA Hymnal
(Singing the Living Tradition, Boston: UUA, 1993)
Welcome and Opening Check-In (30 minutes)
Welcome participants and thank them
for coming. Make sure that everyone knows
where to find restrooms, water fountains, and other necessities.
Encourage people to share their accessibility needs now or throughout
the program. Introduce yourself and the program, offering time for
questions. Circulate a sheet of paper so that people can write down
contact information for your records.
Light the Chalice. Share reading #563 “A Person Will Worship Something” from the UUA Hymnal (Singing the
Living Tradition) or another reading, hymn or songof your choosing.
Allow a short time of silence before continuing.
Explain to participants that before
you begin, you would like the group to establish ground rules. Tell them that ground rules are used to make a safe space for personal
sharing. Ask a volunteer to record the group’s suggested guidelines
on newsprint. If certain rules you find important are not mentioned,
suggest them yourself (see “Getting Started” for common ground rules).
Once the group has finished brainstorming ideas, check to make sure
that everyone is comfortable with the ground rules. Ask participants
if they are willing to enter into a covenant to abide by the rules
they have created. If this is already a covenant group, or a group
that meets regularly outside of this particular series, take this
time to review your current ground rules and see if the group wishes
to change them in any way.
Specifically discuss the role of
personal sharing. Remind participants
that inProverbs of Ashes the authors share personal material
as a basis for exploring theological questions that matter to a
wide range of people. In this same spirit, participants will be
invited to share personal stories. The purpose of such sharing
is to deepen theological reflection on life experience. Participants
should feel free to decide what they want to share, without compulsion.
If confidentiality is requested, it should be honored.
Tell participants that every session
will begin with a check-in. Ask that the
sharing go around the circle, with people offering a brief description
of how they are doing. If the program is scheduled right after a
busy time of day you may want to suggest a theme for the check-in,
to help people make the transition to group work. For this first
session, ask that participants introduce themselves and state their
expectations for the program. Make sure that everyone has a nametag.
Possible ideas for check-in themes include:
- describing an image from Proverbs
of Ashes that particularly struck you;
- mentioning one thing that motivated
you to participate in this program; or
- sharing a brief reflection from
your journal.
Small Group Discussion: How have Christian Theologies Affected
You? (15 minutes)
Separate into pairs. Allow each person
about 7 minutes to share. In Proverbs of Ashes, the authors draw
on their personal histories with Christian teachings. Whether we
grew up as Christians or interacted with Christianity in the larger
society, most of us have also been affected by social and/or religious
cultures of Christianity. There is no one Christianity. Each of
us has a particular history, understanding and emotional response
to these teachings. With your partner, share ways in which Christianity
has affected you.
Large Group Sharing: What Did We Hear? (20 minutes)
Invite participants back into the
large group. What were the common themes that presented themselves
in your small groups? What were the differences that emerged? In
what ways were themes of violence or sufferingpresent in your discussion?
Time for Reflection and Prayer: (5 minutes)
Acknowledge that these subjects are
difficult, and invite participants to enter together into a space
of quiet reflection, meditation, or prayer. We suggest that you
open this time with a reading, hymn or song of your choosingand
then allow space for participants to give voice to their own prayers.
You may wish to use one of the following readings from the UUA Hymnal (Singing the Living Tradition) : #488, #494, #496,
#507, #510, #516, #524, and #609.
Break (5 minutes)
Invite participants to take 5 minutes to stretch,
get refreshments, and use the bathrooms.
A Tapestry of Theologies, A Weave of Images (15 minutes)
Rebecca Parker writes of being raised with the understanding
that “sacrifice is the way of life… To make sacrifice or to be sacrificed
is virtuous and redemptive.” (Proverbs of Ashes, p. 25) Our religious
histories have left us with legacies, positive and negative, that
have affected how we view the world. What are some phrases or images
from your childhood that have stayed with you? Examples include:
The Golden Rule, Apples and The “Sin” of Eve, Noah’s Ark, The Kingdom
of God, Loaves and Fishes, Children Should Be Seen and not Heard. Ask for a volunteer to record on newsprint images, phrases, or
snapshots that come to peoples’ minds. Post sheets around the room
as they become full.
Large Group Discussion: Reweaving Our Theologies (20 minutes)
Invite the group to look at the collected
images and phrases. What still feels meaningful? Which are still
affecting you on a subconscious level – even if you wish otherwise?
In what ways do you think differently about these ideas now that
you are an adult? How can we translate some of these concepts to
make them positive parts of our lives?
Preparing for the Next Session (5 minutes)
During the next session, we will
be exploring how theologies perpetuate violence and the idea of
redemptive suffering. Encourage group members to continue journalling.
Ask them to bring specific examples of how religious leaders and
religious communities respond to violence in problematicways. Invite
them to consider instances of violence from the news (such as: September
11, 2001; The War on Terrorism; The Columbine Shootings; or Matthew
Shepherd’s murder), Proverbs of Ashes, or their own lives.
Closing Reading (5 minutes)
Thank the participants for their presence
and participation. Close with reading #580 “The Task of the Religious
Community” from the UUA Hymnal (Singing the Living Tradition)
or with another reading or songof your choosing.
Extinguish the chalice. Ask for volunteers
to help restore the room to its original state.
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Session Two: How Theologies
Can Perpetuate Violence
Materials: Newsprint,
markers, masking tape, chalice, candle, matches, UUA Hymnal (Singing
the Living Tradition, Boston: UUA, 1993)
Chalice Lighting and Check-In (15 minutes)
To open this session, light the chalice
and read #462 from the UUA Hymnal (Singing in the Living Tradition)oranother
reading or song of your choosing. Allow a short time of silence
before continuing.
After the reading or song, ask people
to go around the circle and share briefly. Have people check-in
quickly and if they wish, invite them to share a moment when they
learned something from listening to one another during the last
session.
Large Group Discussion: Religious Responses to Violence (45 minutes)
Rita Nakashima Brock writes, “Christianity
is haunted by the ghost of Jesus. His death was an unjust act of
violence that needed resolution. Such deaths haunt us. Rather than
address the horror and anguish of his death, Christianity has tried
to make it a triumph.” (Proverbs of Ashes, p. 60) Jesus’ story has
been shaped by the history of responses that religions have made
to his death. Likewise, many other victims of violence have found
their own stories subsumed by religious justifications that turn
violent realities into the stories of our salvation. Ask participants
to share their reflections since the last session, examining how
religious leaders and religious communities have responded to violence
in problematicways. Encourage them to share their perspectives on
how theologies perpetuate violence and the idea of redemptive suffering,
using their examples from the news, Proverbs of Ashes, or their
own lives.
Time for Reflection and Prayer: (5 minutes)
Acknowledge that these subjects are
difficult, and invite participants to enter together into a space
of quiet reflection, meditation, or prayer. We suggest that you
open this time with a song orreading and then allow space for participants
to give voice to their own prayers. You may wish to use one of the
following readings from the UUA Hymnal (Singing the Living Tradition)
: #488, #494, #496, #507, #510, #516, #524, and #609.
Break (5 minutes)
Invite participants to take 5 minutes
to stretch, get refreshments, and use the bathrooms.
Writing Exercise (15 minutes)
Ask the group to spend the next 15
minutes writing in their journals. What issues of violence from
the large group discussion particularly affected you? How do you
wish religious leaders or communities had responded? What response
might you make to that situation or how would you acknowledge the
tragedy?
Sharing (15 minutes)
Break into groups of three or four
and share a portion of your writings and reflections with one another.
Large Group Sharing (15 minutes)
Welcome participants back into the
large group. Ask them to share something they learned about themselves
or their personal beliefs from this exercise or from today’s session.
Closing (5 minutes)
Close with reading #466 “Religion” from
the UUA Hymnal (Singing the Living Tradition) or with another reading
or song of your choosing.
Extinguish the chalice. Ask for volunteers
to help restore the room to its original state.
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Session Three: Redemptive Suffering and the Reframing of Theology
Materials: Newsprint,
markers, masking tape, chalice, candle, matches, UUA Hymnal (Singing
the Living Tradition, Boston: UUA, 1993)
Chalice Lighting and Check-In (15 minutes)
To open this session, light the chalice
and share reading #453 from the UUA Hymnal (Singing the Living Tradition)
or another reading or songof your choosing. Allow a short time of
silence before continuing.
After the reading or song, ask people
to check-in brieflyand invite them to share a moment when they learned
something from listening to one another during the last session.
Small Group Discussion: The Idea of Redemptive Suffering (15 minutes)
Regardless of our personal beliefs about
sin, suffering, and salvation, our society is shaped by the religious
concept that good will come from the sacrifice of ourselves or others.
Rita Nakashima Brock and Rebecca Ann Parker describe what they have
concluded about redemptive suffering. Violence does not redeem us.
Religious communities do harm when they confuse suffering with a
path to salvation.
Ask participants to break into groups
of three or four. How did you respond to the concept of redemptive
suffering? Which examples from the book spoke to you? How have you
encountered the idea that suffering or violence must be accepted
as part of love or redemption?
Large Group Discussion: (30 minutes)
Welcome members back into the large
group. Invite them to share reflections that emerged in the small
group discussion. Continue the conversation with the full group.
Time for Reflection and Prayer: (5 minutes)
Acknowledge that these subjects are
difficult, and invite participants to enter together into a space
of quiet reflection, meditation, or prayer. We suggest that you
open this time with a reading, meditative song, or chantand then
allow space for participants to give voice to their own prayers.
You may choose one of the following readings from the UUA Hymnal
(Singing the Living Tradition) or any other reading of your
choosing: #488, #494, #496, #507, #510, #516, #524, and #609.
Break (5 minutes)
Invite participants to take 5 minutes
to stretch, get refreshments, and use the bathrooms.
Large Group Discussion: The Search for What Saves Us (30 minutes)
Read the following quotation to the
group. “Salvation begins with the courage of witnesses whose
gaze is steady. Steady witnesses neither flee in horror to hide
their eyes, nor console with sweet words, ‘It isn’t all that bad.
Something good is intended by this.’ Violence is illuminated by
insistent exposure. Steady witnesses end the hidden life of violence
by bringing it to public attention. They help to restore souls fragmented
by violence. They accompany the journey to healing.” (Proverbs
of Ashes, p. 250)
Begin a conversation about the meaning
of salvation. What do you believe about how the effects of violence
and injustice can be repaired, resisted or transformed? What does
the idea of salvation as “restoration of souls fragmented by violence”call
us to? What is the purpose of religious community?
Reflection on the Series (15 minutes)
Encourage participants to go around
the circle and each offer a few sentences on their feelings about
the program. What was particularly meaningful
or helpful? What was difficult What will you think about further? Is there any feedback that they would offer for improvements to
the program overall?
Use this time to ask people to fill
out the participant evaluation form and leader
evaluation form
Closing
Close with reading the final page of
Proverbs of Ashes (p. 252). Invite each participant to express
a word of benediction or blessing. End with a song if the group
has enjoyed singing.
Extinguish the chalice. Thank participants
for their sharing, enthusiasm, and participation. Ask for volunteers
to help restore the room to its original state.
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For further reading:
We recommend the following Beacon books in
addition to those listed in Proverbs of Ashes on p. 253-254:
- Is God A White Racist? A Preamble to Black
Theology, by William R. Jones
- Next Time, She’ll Be Dead: Battering and How
to Stop It, by Ann Jones
- Dancing After the Whirlwind, L.J. Tessier
- Sexism and God-Talk: Toward a Feminist Theology,
by Rosemary Radford Ruether
For further group study:
We recommend the “Wallingford Study Guide to Proverbs
of Ashes”, a six-week program especially suitable for Christian
groups, that explores the theological issues raised in Proverbs
of Ashes. The Wallingford Guide is available through Starr
King School for the Ministry’s website: www.sksm.edu.
Acknowledgments
We would like to thank the following
people for their support on this project:
Devorah Greenstein, Julia Watts Belser and Sofía
Betancourt of Starr King School for the Ministry. Advisory Committee:
Donna Bivens, Co-Director, Women’s Theological Center; Rev. Nancy
Bowen, Clara Barton District Consultant; Rev. Marjorie Bowens-Wheatley,
Adult Programs Director, UUA Dept. of Religious Education; Jacqui
James, Anti-Oppression Programs and Resources Director, UUA Dept.
of Religious Education; Rev. Meg Riley, Director of UUA Washington
Office, Dept. for Faith in Action
We are grateful for assistance from
the New Hampshire Vermont, Pacific Northwest, Thomas Jefferson,
Joseph Priestley, Pacific Central, and Northeast Districts and for
support from the Unitarian Universalist Veatch Program at Shelter
Rock.
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BEACON PRESS DISCUSSION GUIDES
PARTICIPANT EVALUATION FORM
Name (optional):
Date:
Group Leader:
Book Title:
Please indicate your evaluation of the following:
meeting space |
poor
|
fair
|
okay
|
good
|
great
|
pacing
|
poor
|
fair
|
okay
|
good
|
great
|
content
|
poor
|
fair
|
okay
|
good
|
great
|
overall
|
poor
|
fair
|
okay
|
good
|
great
|
1. Do you think the sessions were: (Please
check one)
____too long ____about
right ____too short
How long would you like the sessions to be?
________________________________
2. Do you think there were: (Please check
one)
____too many sessions ____the right number
of sessions ____too few sessions
If you thought there were too many sessions,
which one(s) would you leave out?
3. If your large group broke into smaller
groups for discussion, did this process work? Why or why not?
4. Is there anything that you would like
to have talked about that was not included in the sessions? If so, what?
5. What activity(ies) did you especially
like? Why?
6. If there was an activity that you feel
did not work in this context, can you tell us which activity and why?
7. Question:
8. Question:
9. Please rate your group leader’s skills
in leading the session(s): (Circle one)
Excellent Good
Average Fair Poor
10. What suggestions would you offer to the
group leader to improve the way the group is conducted?
Thank you for taking the time to give us your feedback!
Please return this form to:
Helene Atwan, Director
Beacon Press
25 Beacon Street
Boston, MA 02108-2800
BEACON PRESS DISCUSSION GUIDES
LEADER EVALUATION FORM
Name:
Date:
UU Society:
District:
Book Title:
1. Do you and/or your participants think
the sessions were: (Please check one)
____too long ____about
right ____too short
How long would you like the sessions to be?
________________________________
2. Do you think that there were: (Please
check one)
____too many sessions ____the right number
of sessions ____too few sessions
If you thought there were too many sessions,
which ones would you leave out?
3. If your large group broke into smaller
groups for discussion, did this process work? Why or why not?
4. Is there anything that you would like
to have talked about that was not included in the sessions? If so, what?
5. What activity(ies) did you especially
like and why?
6. If there was an activity that you feel
did not work in this context, can you tell us which activity and why?
7. Do you think the discussion guides will
help to promote a stronger sense of community in your congregation?
Why or why not?
8. Can you suggest other books or subjects
that might work in this context?
9. If you changed the format, please describe
the changes you made and your reason for making them.
Thank you for taking the time to give us your
feedback!
Please return this form to:
Helene Atwan, Director
Beacon Press
25 Beacon Street
Boston, MA 02108-2800