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The Lonely American - Drifting Apart in the Twenty-first Century
The Lonely American: Drifting Apart in the Twenty-first Century
Authors: Jacqueline Olds MD, Richard S. Schwartz MD
Product Code: 0034 ISBN: 978-080700034-2
Binding Information: Cloth 
6 X 9 Inches (US)
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Price: $24.95 In stock.
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The personal and societal effects of the unheralded epidemic of social isolation in America
In today's world, it is more acceptable to be depressed than to be lonely-yet loneliness appears to be the inevitable byproduct of our frenetic contemporary lifestyle. According to the 2004 General Social Survey, one out of four Americans talked to no one about something of importance to them during the last six months. Another remarkable fact emerged from the 2000 U.S. Census: more people are living alone today than at any point in the country's history-fully 25 percent of households consist of one person only. In this crucial look at one of America's few remaining taboo subjects-loneliness-Drs. Jacqueline Olds and Richard S. Schwartz set out to understand the cultural imperatives, psychological dynamics, and physical mechanisms underlying social isolation.

In The Lonely American, cutting-edge research on the physiological and cognitive effects of social exclusion and emerging work in the neurobiology of attachment uncover startling, sobering ripple effects of loneliness in areas as varied as physical health, children's emotional problems, substance abuse, and even global warming. Surprising new studies tell a grim truth about social isolation: being disconnected diminishes happiness, health, and longevity; increases aggression; and correlates with increasing rates of violent crime. Loneliness doesn't apply simply to single people, either-today's busy parents "cocoon" themselves by devoting most of their non-work hours to children, leaving little time for friends, and other forms of social contact, and unhealthily relying on the marriage to fulfill all social needs.

As a core population of socially isolated individuals and families continues to balloon in size, it is more important than ever to understand the effects of a culture that idealizes busyness and self-reliance. It's time to bring loneliness-a very real and little-discussed social epidemic with frightening consequences-out into the open, and find a way to navigate the tension between freedom and connection in our lives.

Find out more at

In the Media:

Read the authors' post on loneliness around Valentine's day

Read an excerpt from The Lonely American in Utne

Read a review in Psychotherapy Networker

Listen to an interview with Drs. Olds and Schwartz on the AARP Bulletin

Review   Library Journal - November 4, 2008
"Like seminal works . . . this recent addition to the sociological and psychological literature on loneliness is a substantive contribution. . . . The authors capture the essence of our depressed and disjointed culture, especially now that the economy is failing and workaholism is no longer a viable refuge for many. They offer no foolproof solutions, but they do successfully generate awareness of the problem and encourage the ubiquitous lonely Americans to seek attachment and commitment as they pursue happiness. Highly recommended for all public and university libraries."
Review   O Magazine - February 1, 2009
"A thought-provoking, engagingly lucid book. . . . [Olds and Schwartz] have written a wise, balanced, and evocative inquiry; their finger is on the pulse of something very real."
Review   Psychotherapy Networker - April 1, 2009
"An intriguing, cautionary critique . . . [a] call to break through the potentially narcissistic intensity of the therapeutic encounter."
Review   San Francisco Chronicle - March 2, 2009
"Olds wrote the book with her husband, Dr. Richard Schwartz, because, she said, she wanted to bring loneliness 'out of the closet.' The two were struck by findings from the General Social Survey (conducted by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago), showing that people reported having fewer intimate friends in 2004 than they had in 1985. When asked how many people they could confide in, the average number declined over that same time period from three to two. In 2004, almost a quarter of those surveyed said they had no one to discuss important matters with in the past six months; in 1985, only 7 percent were devoid of close confidantes."
Review   Publishers Weekly - December 15, 2008
"This workmanlike book takes up where Robert D. Putnam's classic Bowling Alone left off in examining the disintegration of community in 21st-century America. Americans, say the authors (both associate clinical professors of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School), have a conflicted views of community: on the one hand, they glorify rugged individualism and, on the other hand, they encourage community and look down on those who cast off community to go it alone. Drawing on interviews with their patients and on numerous studies, Olds and Schwartz point out that being a loner isn't all it's cracked up to be, and many who shun community are surprised at how lonely and socially isolated they feel. The authors conclude that Americans drift away from social connections because of the frenetic and overscheduled intensity of modern life as well as the American pantheon of self-reliant heroes."
Review   The American Journal of Psychiatry - May 1, 2009
"Overall, the book is a wistful analysis of interpersonal connection and its avatars in times of amazing technological advances and economic affluence. The authors’ social message is not lost to us: together we may be better for the environment as well as for each other."

"In a wise, quiet, and gentle voice, Drs. Olds and Schwartz offer a devastating portrait of present-day American culture-the fragility of social bonds, the busyness that has become a badge of social worth, the conflict between the need for respite from the frantic pace and the gnawing feelings of exclusion and loneliness that accompany our attempts to slow it down. This is a book for our time, a book that calls all of us to take a serious look at the social and psychological costs of the way we live today."
-Dr. Lillian B. Rubin, author of Just Friends, Intimate Strangers, and 60 on Up

"In today's society the pursuit of individual happiness, materialism, and the frenetic pace of life has led many people unwittingly into lifestyles where they feel lonely and excluded. Yet we know that such states are damaging to physical and mental health. In their important new book, Drs. Olds and Schwartz provide a compassionate and insightful analysis of the conflicting currents that have led to this state of affairs, and they describe ways in which this pattern can be changed through individual and community efforts."
-Dr. Bruce S. McEwen, author of The End of Stress as We Know It

"An insightful, important, and comprehensive look at the causes and effects of the pervasive psychological and social isolation within contemporary American culture. The authors offer wise, compassionate, and helpful strategies toward the renewal of our essential human connections."
-Janet L. Surrey, Ph.D. Founding Scholar, Jean Baker Miller Training Institute, Wellesley College, and Samuel Shem, author of The House of God

"If you want to know why, in the midst of so many and so much, Americans all too often feel alone and disconnected, this is the volume for you. Drs. Olds and Schwartz have written a book that is scientifically rigorous and socially acute, delving deep into the latest research on the neurobiology behind our need for connection and the adverse effects of social isolation, while also unpacking the dangerous cultural myths that would deny these needs. Hooray for Olds and Schwartz's sagacity, lucidity, humanity, and practicality. Read their book and take their advice for your own sake and for the rest of us, as well!"
-Dr. William Pollack, author of Real Boys, Rescuing Ours Sons from the Myth of Masculinity and director of the Centers for Men and Young Men at McLean Hospital/Harvard Medical School

"Our contemporary situation is one of material affluence and social isolation. Olds and Schwartz provide a thoughtful and important analysis of how we came to cut ourselves off from one another, and what the consequences are."
-Daniel Nettle, PhD, author of Happiness: The Science behind Your Smile

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